Archive for special events

Change Is Coming

January 19, 2009 · Filed under Celebs, special events · Tagged , , , , ,

This week, a historical event will take place. This life-changing day is something many of us had hoped and prayed for, but never thought we would see. A change in every sense of the word. A bringing together of what often seemed to be two sides of the same coin. A moment in time that will rewrite the history books and open the minds of people not only here in the U.S. but around the world.

 
We speak, of course, of tonight’s Kids’ Inaugural: We Are The Future concert, co-headlined by the Jonas Brothers and Miley Cyrus. That’s right. Nick Jonas and Miley Cyrus will share a stage for the first time since they broke up last year. After all the speculation, all the YouTube videos, all the angry song lyrics (”the seven things I hate about you: you’re vain, your games, you’re insecure” sure as heck wasn’t written about Miley’s math teacher). Finally, the beef has been silenced and two of America’s favorite tween popstars will share a mic stand once again.

 
As with any great moment, there is often negativity lurking around the corner, waiting to overshadow the excitement. That negativity comes in the form of performer Demi Lovato, whose BFF Selena Gomez is Nick’s new flame. We all remember Miley and her BFF Mandy laying the viral video smackdown on Selena and Demi (both named after people who were super famous in the 90s….how Cher and Dionne of them!), calling Selena’s Power Rangers shirt and heavy eye makeup “so emo” and suggesting both girls suffered from a serious case of the Clap. (We might have made that second part up, but seriously, how awesome would that have been!?)

 
With any luck, Lovato will stick to singing, Gomez will stick to her assigned seat in Nick’s dressing room, and Cyrus will focus her energy on performing in some ridiculous outfit that makes Britney Spears’ VMA costumes look tasteful. Because what matters on this night, above all else, is that the olive branch has been extended. Two warring sides have put down their pens and instruments and will share the spotlight out of respect for each other and some big political deal that we don’t have all the deets on.
Now all the secret service has to worry about is that ticking time bomb/Joe Jonas ex Taylor Swift. That girl’s definitely got a crazy streak. We wouldn’t put it past her to rush the stage and take Joe down with her guitar.

Leave a comment »

Just like Edward in New Moon…we’re back!

January 16, 2009 · Filed under Trends, special events · Tagged , , ,

Hey ATM fan(s), we’re back! We know, we know, you’ve heard it all before, but we promise this time. No, really!

So where have we been you ask? The same place as you, dear ATM reader(s), hiding out in our bedrooms with our noses burried deep in Twilight books. Don’t lie, we know you’re swooning over Edward right along with us. Yes, it’s written for teens about teens, but when you break it all down, does that make it any different than ATM? Exactly.

That said, there is a bit of a stigma placed upon fans of high school vampire romance novels, so we decided to up the adult factor. (As if those steamy makeout scenes weren’t enough…we can’t say more, one of the ATM creators is only on Eclipse…lame!) How you ask? Two words: drinking game!

Here’s how it works. Sneak a bottle of red wine (it looks like blood, duh) into your favorite local theater. Is the film no longer playing in your town? Do as our friends did (not us, mind you, our friends) and download the movie off the Internet. (Did you know you could do that??) Just remember to pay full price for the double disk special edition DVD when it comes out March 21 to cover your karma. And to see the behind the scenes interviews with Rob Pattinson. Sigh. We digress…

Grab your bottle of blood and follow these simple rules. Just remember, just because Edward has to show some restraint around Bella’s blood, doesn’t mean you have to hold back on the vino. It’s only symbolic, afterall. So, back to the rules. Drink every time…

• Bella breathes like she’s running a marathon.
• You notice Rosalie’s roots.
• Jessica does something annoying.
• Charlie and Billy’s banter gets awkward.
• You can hear RPatz’s British accent (see: hospital corridor scene).
• You notice Carlisle’s roots.
• A character comes onscreen who looks exactly the opposite of the way you saw them in your mind (Tyler and Eric, anyone?).
• The special effects make you want to poke your eyes out with your copy of New Moon.
• Emmet is onscreen. Because you know he’d want you to.
• Jasper makes a face like a mentally challenged jackyl.

Bonus Round #1:
• Take a shot whenever Bella and Edward kiss on the lips.
 
Bonus Round #2 (not for the faint of heart, so don’t try it, Bella):
• Drink every time you swoon over Edward’s vampirific hotness. Yeah, we said it.
 
 
*Note: if you play this game in the theater, do as the high school girls who love the book do and have your mom pick you up. You’re not immortal like a Cullen, afterall.

Comments (9) »

Super Sizing Up The Candidates

February 5, 2008 · Filed under Advice, special events

While MTV has been telling us for months how important it is to vote in this year’s Presidential Election, we question their commitment to the race.  Not only did they schedule an important debate on a Saturday night (nothing is more important than going out), but they support holding their precious Super Tuesday on Mardi Gras!  How do they expect us to vote when we’re tipsy and full of King’s Cake and Zattaran’s?  And after those poor choices, why would we take their advice on the candidates?  So, for once we didn’t turn to MTV for our news, but rather did what we do best and logged into MySpace to get the real truth.  What better way to learn the character of the candidates than from surveys written during the work day, personal blog postings, and most importantly, their Top Friends.
 
HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON (Democrat)

Number of Friends:  173,179 (watch out Tila Tequila)
How she organizes her Top Friends: Based on who has the best Hilary default photo.
Survey Confessed Interest: Reading.  However, we wonder how good of a reader she is when two of the books she has written have been Dear Socks, Dear Buddy: Kids’ Letter to the First Pets and Drawings by Child Survivors of the Rwandan Genocide. Hey Hil, not cool to exploit teenage youth for your literary needs. Oh wait…
Why You Should Vote For her: Just like us, Hillary loves ice cream and shopping!  She is a member of both the TCBY and the Wal-Mart Board of Advisors.


MIKE HUCKABEE (Republican. Hey…just like One Republic. They’re so hot right now!)Number of Friends: 34,470
#1 Friend: Janet Huckabee (His Baby Mama)
#1 Supporter: Stephen Colbert. Not nearly as hot as Dane Cook, but still kinda hot for an old guy.
MySpace Confessed Talent: Rockstar. Plays bass for the band, Capitol Offense: www.myspace/capitoloffense who jams in the basement of the Governor’s Mansion
Hottest venue played: Chuck Norris’ ranch. Next stop…the White House. Hey, if you hear the White House rockin’, don’t come a knockin’. Hilary is soooo not going to be on the VIP list.
Why you should vote for him: He understands MySpace’s importance and took the guess work out of stalking…he posted his address and phone number. Take that Google.

BARACK OBAMA (Democrat)

Number of Friends: 254,178 (watch out Hillary)
Top Friends: Massachusetts for Obama, Arizona for Obama, Illinois for Obama, Iowa for Obama…okay, every state for Obama…AND Third Eye Blind
Trendsetting Contribution:  The cell phone ringtone that says, “It’s time to answer the call.”Why You Should Vote For Him: That girl on YouTube said he was hot. Plus she has crush on him and since 5.7 million people know that, you should have a crush on him, too. 

JOHN McCAIN (Republican. He likes One Republic, too? How cool.)

Number of Friends: 44,639
Top Friend: What?! Meghan is not his Top Friend?!  This could be his downfall.  She’s the only reason he’s still in the campaign. I mean, have you not been keeping up with mccainblogette.com? She’s the one who tells him how to be cool…and is doing all the work on the campaign trail. #1 Supporter: Arnold Schwarzenegger

Why You Should Vote For Him: A vote for John is a vote for Meghan. She’s on MTV. A lot. We think she might be sleeping with Sway….which would cause one heck of a scandal over the next four years. Screw you Amy Carter…and your morals. 

Leave a comment »

Re-VAMP-ing Miss America

January 28, 2008 · Filed under Reality TV, special events

Q:What do pregnant teens and Miss America have in common? 
A: Crowning!

When Nickelodeon’s teen sweetheart got knocked up and the singing poster child for high school independence got naked, the world skidded to a halt for some much needed social evaluation.  What sort of example were we presenting our youth?  Were we telling our pigtailed cuties that it was okay to be pregnant and unmarried at 16?  As the worldwide debate wages on, TLC attempted to answer the question, “is it okay that Nickelodeon continue to air episodes of Zoey 101 even though the actress is pregnant?” through the American tradition of pageantry.

In a blatant ratings plea, normally hum-drum TLC unveiled their interpretations of today’s female role model in the new, hip 2008 Miss America Pageant Saturday night.   Reinventing Miss America to become the new social “it-girl” but claiming the same iconic role model status, the contestants slutted their stuff down the runway in a less than picture perfect fashion.  Wearing outfits that covered less than usual (but with somehow just as many sequins), the “it-girl” hopefuls were asked to explain their outfit choices to their young female audience:  the overwhelming red dress represented Miss South Carolina’s intense passion (she was totally sleeping with the host), the slit from ground to crotch showed off Miss Tennessee’s long, flexible legs (which we’re sure will play an important role in future charity work if given the opportunity to reign) , and the navel plunging neck line was just as low in the back because Miss Wisconsin considered herself balanced (where? In bed?).

Set to music straight out of Debbie Does Dallas and on a stage built to replicate the neighboring Vegas hotspot, the Sapphire Club,  the ladies of the night proactively posed in their cleavage-supporting bikinis in, not a contest of swimwear, but rather plastic surgery, competing in cup size (sorry Miss Wisconsin…).  The new Miss America, who was supposed to replace the Lindsay Lohans and Britney Spears of today, didn’t have teenage girls perfecting their posture and learning to walk with books on their head.  No, this year girls began stuffing their bras and dropping it like it’s hot.

So when it finally came for the girls to open their mouth, TLC gave us what we’ve been waiting for: the hard hitting questions dominating the minds of today’s concerned public.  Using a “man on the street approach” each contestant was asked an uncannily similar question (and without a cone of silence in sight!)  And in what could be the contest’s morality-defining moment, one such man on the street (who was way too old to know about the subject) was asked: “Do you think Jamie Lynn Spears should be fired from Zoey 101?” Miss Indiana responded: “No, I do not think she should be fired. Teenagers make mistakes.  They’re still people. They’re still human beings.  We all deserve second chances.” (News flash Miss Indiana:  we gave Britney a second chance-Jayden James-and look how well that worked.)

While we’re pretty sure TLC agreed with Miss Indiana’s stance on teenage pregnancy, they didn’t crown her the 2008 “It-Girl.” Instead, the title went to Miss Michigan, which one can assume was based on her decision to wear a Britney Spears-meets Nancy Kerrigan inspired sheer dress with strategically placed sequins.  (It should be noted that the traditional Miss America song was replaced by a techno remix spun by the onstage DJ.)  With a year to reign, the 19-year old will have just enough time to become the first Miss America teenage mom, ensuring huge ratings for next year’s pageant…which of course, is the most important point of it all.

Leave a comment »

A Not-So-Golden Year

January 11, 2008 · Filed under Trends, special events

Ahh, 2008.  A new year.  A fresh beginning.  It still has that new car smell.  A whole 365 days of celeb gossip to dish, new TV series to get hooked on (The Real Housewives of New York, anyone?) and up-and-coming beefcakes to scout out and drool over (someone’s gotta dethrone that damn Zack Efron!).

You’re already doing all you can to keep up those New Year’s resolutions: a strong internet connection with Perezhilton.com bookmarked? Check.  A brand new subscription to US Weekly? Check.  A recently deleted Tivo ready to record every moment of the second half of Awards Season? Check.   Being privy to inside celeb gossip, knowing the hottest hair styles for summer, and who wore what on the red carpet will assure that you’re the go-to girl for all the is trendy.  Who cares that your horoscope said, “your love life will take a new direction and your waistline will succumb to temptation,” you’ve forged your own path for a GREAT 2008.

That was until the writers went on strike, the celebs rallied the cause, and NBC had no choice but to cancel the Golden Globes, rendering your empty Tivo useless, blogs ten times less interesting, and the ABS rack at Bloomies completely empty (no designer gowns on the red carpet means the man has nothing to knock off this season)!   How will you know what color to wear, hair styles to avoid, and which Hollywood hottie to worship?

More important than being nominated and in the company of great talent, we all know the real honor for any celeb is being named Best Dressed.  For us, on the other hand, our reward is knowing what’s in and what’s out based on the fashion risks of the Hollywood famous.  Resse Witherspoon made pockets in dresses a must have and Johnny Depp made your boyfriend’s reluctance to shave socially acceptable.   Jessica Alba motivated us to work out and Mary Kate inspired us to ALWAYS look in the mirror before leaving the house.

Now when we flip on the TV, open a magazine, or click over to a website we won’t learn of the newest up and coming designer, know how to outshine the other girls at prom, which dog is trendy (or if they’re trendy at all), and what qualities to look for in a guy.  Without writers and celebs, we’ll think the Walmart commercials really do define fashion, have a crush on that guy from season 5 of the Real World (who will totally kick Coral’s ass in the new Gauntlet), and think that Britney’s weave isn’t so bad. 

All we can do is wait for the Oscars.  And pray they don’t meet the same fate.

Leave a comment »

« Previous Page — « Previous entries
Next entries » — Next Page »