Remember back in elementary school when you were assigned a pen pal with whom you wrote back and forth every week? You knew nothing about this person other than they were a student in the same grade as you, but you still shared your day-to-day musings with them like you’d known them for years. Sure the letters were no more than a few sentences long (later those would be called “tweets”), but it killed time during the usually boring school day to write and read these back and forth letters. Plus, there was something rewarding in telling a complete stranger about the ups and downs of your life (as up and down as they can be in 5th grade). They didn’t care that you didn’t like Ecto Cooler, kicked your crush in the shins or got a C on your Island of the Blue Dolphins book report. They were always there to listen.
Then, when we became too cool for school (or at least our school assigned pen pals), we turned to AOL chat rooms, where we found new electronic buddies who were always just a click away. No matter when you were online, one of your buddies popped up to be your best friend and confidant. (And occasionally you’d even tell them your real name.)
But where do we turn now that we’re in our twenties? Chat rooms certainly aren’t cool (unless you’re Chris Hanson trying to catch a predator) and who has time to write a letter? (If you can’t do it from your Blackberry, what’s the point?) That’s why here at ATM, we suggest finding a texting buddy, someone who will return your text at a moment’s notice to do nothing more than satisfy your need to “just tell someone.”
Ever feel like a jerk when you arrive alone to a party with no one to talk to? (Don’t worry, you’re not alone: we’re pretty sure Jennifer Aniston deals with the same thing all the time. Just with more toned arms.) You’ve spent all day talking to your real friends, so you have nothing to text to them, and Tweeting will expose your jerk status to the world (not like that’s ever stopped Spencer Pratt. BURN, Pratt!). If only you had a texting buddy, someone who would happily accept your text and reply back, making you look cool in front of the room full of strangers. (Or at least giving you somewhere to avert your gaze.)
But, like all good relationships, there are rules in having a texting buddy. It’s important that you’ve met them, but even more important that you never want to see them again. You need to establish that your new texting buddy is not a crazy person (sorry, Octomom), but has the same sense of humor and keeps the same hours you do. We suggest picking someone at a bar (but not your favorite bar). It’s perfect, if you think about it! You’ve spent a drunk hour talking to this person, so you already have something in common. At the end of the night exchange numbers and bingo! Instant texting buddy!
As a rule, you and your new texting buddy can’t share friends, neighborhoods, or similar plans. You’ll need to be as vague as possible to ensure your texting buddy relationship doesn’t extend outside its intended purpose. This can lead to awkward real-life run ins, and we don’t want those (see: Heidi Montag and Lauren Conrad). Keeping your relationship strictly text-onic is essential. You’re not looking for a BFF or a soulmate. Just someone you can message when the guy in front of you at the DMV farts. Or winks. Or both!
With proper nurturing (it’s a two-way street afterall!), your texting buddy will be there for you when you’re pissed at your best friend, having a bad day at work, or need someone to flirt with. And you’ll be there for them. No matter the situation, you’ll have someone to chat with. But as we warned yesterday, don’t get too personal…we can’t have real life ruining the well crafted, perfect world we’ve created in our heads. We’d have to resort to pen pal letters again, and our Blackberrys couldn’t handle the work.
